We all have those days when we notice this one flaw in ourselves and it’s so embarrassing since there’s nothing we can do about it and of course everyone is going to notice and laugh, like a pimple or a weird scar or whatever.

Don’t worry about it. Seriously.

I totally ripped out a pretty good chunk of one eyebrow yesterday (Liquid latex accident. Practice safe Halloween makeup, kids), and thought I might die of shame.

Not a single person has noticed but me. Not my coworkers. Not my husband. No one. Life goes on and I’m still fabulous.

ms-cherry-tart:

Skeleton Wars the Movie
Starring Chris Spine

"Humerus! Really tickles your funny bone!"
                                - Gene Siskull

Skeleton Wars the Movie
Starring Chris Spine

theycallmeskittles:

I will not eat these pumpkin spices. I will not eat them, not even for science.

I already did it for you, on the Oreo front at least. They’re nowhere near the deliciousness reached by Pumpkin Spice Philadelphia Cream Cheese, but still tasty when dunked in milk. 7/10 would nom again.

In the spirit of Halloween, what type of monster could you see me as?

Mermaid, themightyglamazon? You’re not thinking big enough. It’s Halloween!

How ‘bout Ghost Mermaid?
image

(via themightyglamazon)

Phone calls I got in my twenties: “Hi! This is Stacey. Wanna hang out this weekend?”

Phone calls I get in my thirties: “Hello. This is your doctor’s office. It’s time to schedule a colonoscopy.”

Adulthood is fab.

The husband brought home Oreo creme filled Chips Ahoy and Cookie dough filled Oreos. I’ve tried questioning his logic. He stands firmly by his choices.

The husband brought home Oreo creme filled Chips Ahoy and Cookie dough filled Oreos.

I’ve tried questioning his logic. He stands firmly by his choices.

Sadness: Knowing that no matter how amazing my survival skills are, I won’t live through the coming zombie apocalypse because I’ll be screwed the moment my prescription medications run out.

I’m a hearthstone, baby. Touch me, and I’ll take you home.

I’m a hearthstone, baby. Touch me, and I’ll take you home.

My wonderful, sweet corgi, Gizmo, crossed the rainbow bridge very recently at the age of 14. He’d been my dog for only six years, but had been my husband’s dog since he (my husband) was 16 years old - nearly half his life. He never liked belly rubs, but he would be your best friend for some ear scritches or a baby carrot. He was a good boy and is very loved and very missed.My sugar gliders used to like to jump on his back when we weren’t looking (He was either too thick-furred to notice, or too old to care), so after he passed, my husband requested a portrait of him as our sugar gliders’ noble steed. As you can probably tell, I am no professional, but I think it’s a nice tribute.Love you, Gizzy.

My wonderful, sweet corgi, Gizmo, crossed the rainbow bridge very recently at the age of 14. He’d been my dog for only six years, but had been my husband’s dog since he (my husband) was 16 years old - nearly half his life. He never liked belly rubs, but he would be your best friend for some ear scritches or a baby carrot. He was a good boy and is very loved and very missed.

My sugar gliders used to like to jump on his back when we weren’t looking (He was either too thick-furred to notice, or too old to care), so after he passed, my husband requested a portrait of him as our sugar gliders’ noble steed. As you can probably tell, I am no professional, but I think it’s a nice tribute.

Love you, Gizzy.